Mantis Style!

See Spongebob. Just see it. You're not too old, you're not too mature, so don't worry about any of that crap. This is honestly the purest form of escapist comedy, couple with the clearest example of deus ex machina possible. If you're not going to go see themovie, at least give the soundtrack a listen to. There are some real gems provided by The Shins, Flaming Lips, Wilco, Prince Paul, and even Spongebob himself gives us a golden track (The Best Day Ever). I've thoroughly enjoyed these super-artists interpretations of the cartoon, and I think you would too.

Speaking of music, Ryan lended me his copy of Spacemonkeys vs. Gorillaz. The album art is very good, and it has a quality jewel case, but do you think that I could also borrow the CD that comes with it next time?

Christmas is all up ons once again, and I think that it's going to be another mad rush to get enough cash and presents this year. I need to go shopping because today is AdBusters completely misguided holiday, Buy Nothing Day. For god's sake, I will buy as much as I can to counteract any retarded hippies fantasy of hemp pop tarts and cars fueled by dreams.

Dinner's on, gotta go.

posted by Tay @ 5:18 PM 0 comments

Y'know, sometimes life takes things easy on you, cuts you some slack. And that's pretty rad. I had a date last night, and halfway through, I was totally prepared to post a funny story about how I screwed up again. But by some amazing fluke, I didn't (screw up). We went to Julio's (this awesome restaraunt in Kensington), saw What The Bleep Do We Know?, and then went back to her place to watch Donnie Darko. Both of these movies are fantastic, the latter more so. What The Bleep is a feel-good picture about quantum mechanics, which thankfully employs some documentary style explanations. Otherwise, it would be crap. Donnie Darko is rad, but don't ask me what it's about. I've got no freakin' clue.

Had I screwed up, I would have posted something like this...

Things To Not Do On A First Date With A Vegan
- Don't wear your leather jacket. Don't ask her to feel the wool lining to see how warm it is.
- At dinner, don't order steak. Don't order it rare. Don't request that it be so rare that you can still hear the cow moo-ing.
- Don't refer to veganism as "all that hippy crap".
- Don't say that your favorite part of "Supersize Me" was Morgan Spurlock's kickass mustache.
- Instead, you may want to consider lying your ass off.

So now I'm reading essays on Donnie Darko, trying to piece together what the hell was going on. That seems like a pretty good way to end this post. Laters.

posted by Tay @ 4:45 AM 0 comments

NEW EVIL DEAD!!! NEW EVIL DEAD!!! NEW EVIL DEAD!!! NEW EVIL DEAD!!! NEW EVIL DEAD!!!

Hopefully this version will pay due tribute to the origins of this cult classic. If Bruce Campbell is indeed starring in the project, they are already halfway there. Failing that, the only replacement actor I could suggest would be Nicholas Brendon, whos stint on Buffy perfectly emulated the Ash character. They just better not screw this up for me, whoever "they" is.

I'd like to apologize for the recent batch of comics recently. They're crap, both in humour and actual product. If the coding isn't a blatent sign that these were rushed, allow me to tell you: these were rushed. I don't think that I'll be subjecting you guys to this filler for much longer though. Instead, I've got a new idea that might just work. Stay tuned.

How in HELL did the themes to Cheers, Home Improvement, and Family Matters get on my iPod? No doubt that either Jon or Colm is to blame, and that this simply slipped through the cracks during the Glorious File Transfer. Luckily, I no longer allow passengers in my car to listen to the dangerous brew that is a fully random iPod, I have playlists that are customized for this purpose. Of course, I never would have instituted this policy were it not for the Star Wars Gangsta Rap Debacle of '04 (We got deathstar!). I think that this situation closely resembles that of international diplomacy.

The way I see it, the US is like that really mean kid that nobody liked in school, but everybody was nice to him because he had a cool swimming pool. If you pretended to like him and went to his birthday party, he'd let you swim in his pool. If not, he'd bomb your ass back to the stoneage. Of course, it was all an act, nobody liked that kid, and it was generally known that he was a bastard.

Of course, to complete this analogy, the kid's pool would have been made by slave labour, but that's a beef for another barbeque.

posted by Tay @ 6:37 AM 0 comments

If you've been following along lately, you may have noticed that I lied. I did not in fact post 10 comics within the 10 hour time limit I gave myself. I should have known at the time that I was asking for too much of myself. As it turns out 10 is not a small number. It is a big number.

I was able to create seven new comics for your general
amusement.

Politics seems to be the topic of conversation lately. I don't speak CNN-ese or anything, but I do have an opinion on most things. The guy who shot that wounded and unarmed guy in the head was probably either bored/frustrated/really fucking stupid, or a more-likely combination of all three. In any case, I think that his actions represent the mindset of the entire military, and he was just a bit dumber in not being able to to control himself. Jones, and other crazies like him, have stated from the start how much easier this war could be if it were allowable to simply kill everybody. Just glass over the middle east and drill through it for the oil. That is what is going through the heads of these marines. They blame the Iraqi people for this war, because they obviously don't blame the president who started it. That frustration, combined with the fact that the maximum IQ for anybody allowed in the army is 38 is bound to cause some problems. Much like Abu-Garib, the situation will become a spectacle, while those responsible will be swept under the rug and forgetten.

A former intelligence officer for the FBI set himself on fire in front of the white house the other day. It reminded me of those buddhist monks who did the same in protest of Vietnam. They succeeded in killing themselves though, where this man failed. The point of the act is to say "I am making you deal with your shit" and then leaving in a glorious blaze. Symbolically, I think that's what the US should do. Leave Iraq, leave the middle east, make them deal with their shit. No more of this White Man's Burden. Fix your damn continent, and if you so much as look at us in anger, we will glass you over. Just looking at this post, I can see that I would not do well in the military. I would probably shoot somebody in the head.

posted by Tay @ 5:12 PM 0 comments

Okay, I have to say this. In the short time that Adam has been blogging, he has proven to hold one of the most fascinating sites out of all the Superbrother gang. The very concept of it is so intriguing, that I can't help but feel some level of shame for boring my friends with Indie Snobbery every nine out of ten posts. I originally built this site to showcase comic material, and I've largely ignored that, in favour of detailng my laundry schedule and other such asinine aspects of my life . Consider me re-inspired though, thanks to Adam. Folks, you are going to be hit with an assload of comics pretty soon. In fact, I'm not sleeping tonight until I've posted 10. That is my promise, stay tuned for either a glorious victory, or shameful defeat.

posted by Tay @ 5:50 PM 0 comments

Halo 2's campaign mode is brilliant, gameplay-wise. The pacing is tight, and the difficulty ramps up at just the right times. The big problem comes with the storyline. Here's an excert of me playing through the game.

Me: "Alright, this has the possibilty to get interesting."
Halo 2: "Trust me, things will get interesting"

A few hours later...
Me: "Okay, things are starting to get a little interesting."
Halo 2: "Trust me, things will get interesting"

A few more hours later...
Me: "Yeah! NOW things are interesting!"
Halo 2: "Great, then I'm sure that you'll love Halo 3! See ya in 2008, sucker!"

At least the multiplayer kicks severe ass.

So I guess that the plan is to go see James Brown on December 8th. I am very excited for this, because I rarely get the opportunity to see shows, and also because it's the Godfather of Soul. To help get with it now, you guys should check out Beat The Devil, a short film that vaguely resembles a commercial of sorts. It features James Brown, who is betting the soul of his driver (Cliive Owen, the baddest ass in all of Britain) against Satan for another 50 years of youth, fame, and fortune. The best part of the movie? James Brown's lines are subtitled for the funk impaired.

I'm actually kind of dissapointed that Ryan's new Spacemonkeyz vs. Gorillaz CD doesn't include a remix of Rock the house. That was one of my favorite tracks. What I would like to know is how Ryan feels this CD compares to the Gorillaz's other remix album, The G-Sides. Isn't it odd how this mish-mash of producers/musicans were aable to merit more remix albums than work they've actually produced themselves?

posted by Tay @ 5:46 AM 0 comments

It's been a while, I know. But at least now I have some things that may be interesting to say, so here we go.

Halo 2 is out. If you don't know what I'm talking about, crawl out from under your rock and prepare to get pwned! Me and Fat Mike waited in line twice for this bad boy, and the stayed up until 9am playing the campaign mode. The story is so crazy, I almost don't want to jump into the multiplayer mode until I finish the game. After reading the "conversations" booklet in the CE version, the summaries of the book series, and whatever else is out there, I simply have to get to the bottom of the story. Oh yeah, and the game itself is pretty fun too.

Krispy Kreme has come to town! They are now making daily deliveries to my local gas station. This means that instead of a scheduled day-trip for the donuts, I can enjoy them in 5 minutes from the time from my craving.

I got a fuck-ton of CDs this week. Ryan burnt me a number of mp3 CDs which is awesome. They have great stuff, like the Jet Set Radio soundtracks, and Cowboy Bebop jazz. I also picked up the new Network album, I'll be sure to review that as soon as I have time to listen to it.

Most importantly though is the CD I got from Mike, the man in Japan. Based solely on the album art and band name, Mike bought and gave me a copy of Porno Graffitti's album, Best Blues. The album cover is a picture of a man's face, which has been painted to look like an apple. The music is hyper-happy j-pop, which always makes me feel nostalgic for some reason. It always reminds me of western pop of the early 90's, except sung in a foreign tongue of sorts. All in all, some very good stuff. I know that I've said it before, but I'll say it again: Thanks Mike!

posted by Tay @ 4:59 PM 0 comments

Halloween was great, just ask anybody who was there. I don't want to talk about that though. I want to review the movie I Heart Huckabees.

The reviews I had heard from others was definitly mixed. Some called it the most random comedy of the year, some walked out halfway through. I can understand why this film is getting mixed reviews, because I believe your enjoyment of it is based solely on your receptiveness to certain philisophical principles.

I don't want to spoil anything for you guys, because I think that you'd all enjoy it. I do however want to point out one aspect of the movie that I found very interesting. Throughout the film, and in one scene in particular, our protagonists adamantly reject the terms "hero" and "philosopher", which I like because such terms rob us of our individual responsibility to act heroic and ask important questions. Also, no matter how close to buzzing the philisophical principles of Buddhism and Taoism, the word religion is not mentioned once, except to make a cheap-shot at Christianity, which I thought was hilarious. It's funny, it's well done, and it makes you think. See this movie.

posted by Tay @ 4:30 PM 0 comments