Mantis Style!

Movie Trailer Madness
It's no secret that I enjoy movie trailers more than I enjoy actual movies. This is because for the most part, movies in their entirety aren't very good. A well-edited trailer is able to take most of the central themes of a movie, and condense it into 30 or so seconds by showing us only the best footage. There's been a few really great trailers released, so let's watch them and discuss, shall we?

Let's start off with a couple movies starring one of my favorite actors, Johnny Depp. The first is Charlie and The Chocolate Factory. It's a Tim Burton treatment, so expect a slightly sickeningly sweet treatment of the source material. I think it's gonna be a hit, but why does Willy Wonka have such a sickly skin colour? Perhaps he's dieing in this version, which would explain his need for a heir to the throne.

It's a Depp/Burton double-whammy with the addition of Corpse Bride. This is a movie where Tim is actually allowed to use the colour black, and he does so with vigour. Between these two movies, the goth kids won't know which licsensed aluminum lunch pail to buy. I'm led to believe that this stuff is actually stop-motion, which blows my mind.

Off to the land of Japan, where things just keep getting crazier and crazier. Kung Fu Hustle looks like a fucking laugh riot, what with the cartoonish special effects, and the worst dance choreography since Fat Joe's Lean Back video. I can't wait for this to come out.

Oh, and it looks like that remake of Appleseed is seeing an American release, which is cool. Is it just me, or can you guys see slowdown and framerate problems in this trailer?

From anime to good ol' fashioned american geekery, we see The Fantastic Four. God this looks like ass. Is that LL Cool J playing The Thing? Jesus, they didn't even cast George Clooney as Reed Richards which would have been the obvious choice. The guy they got looks like a fucking teenager with grey streaks. I'm going to hate paying to see this.

Finally, we have the movie that broke up Hollywoods golden couple, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Or as I like to call it; True Lies 2: Truer Lies. Son of True Lies. True Lies Revenge. Give me a break.

posted by Tay @ 6:48 AM 0 comments

Okay, so I guess I owe some links here and there, as previous posts have been lacking.

To start off with, JP Mike was regaling tales of being an english teacher in Japan earlier, stating that children would clasp there hands together, stick out there pointer fingers, and try to stick them up your ass. At the time I thought this was pure bunk, but confirming reports of the disturbing game of Kancho have now been discovered. Tell us Mike, do they try to grab your penis too, or is it just one unlucky teacher?

For webcomic goodness, check out Jonny Crossbones. It's story reeks of old-school Tin-Tin, except for the fact that Jonny has the coolest name ever, whereas Tin-Tin most certainly does not. Honestly, Crossbones is my favorite webcomic character ever. Simply genious design/artwork.

Oh, and Phil, check this out, I'm sure it's good for a laugh. Wizard ninjas!

In other news, my car is back from the dead, and my savings account is empty. It cost $1350, which is scarily close to the upper limit of my initial estimate. Next time I will make sure my estimate is much lower. To be fair, the first body shop I took it to wanted $3300, which is more than the car is worth, dead or alive. Whatever. Now I'm starting back at square one, savings wise. That G5 gets further and further away every day.

posted by Tay @ 8:23 AM 0 comments

Slow Day
I haven't done a thing all day, so why shouldn't I take the time to post?

Actually, that's not true. I did start a batch of port with my dad, and I will be taking suggestions for labels. I'm thinking that as this is a slight departure from the Superbrother Winery, we can also make a slight departure from The Rule of Three, or any other arbitrary rules we've been holding ourselves to.

Other than that, I've really accomplished nothing today. If I had wanted to, I could have gone all day without wearing pants. Too bad that I only thought of this now. Tomorrow I'm going to get an estimate on the repairs for my car, so we'll see how long my life will be a destitute hell, empty of any of the things that give me pleasure. For example: Fast food and Mike&Ikes.

I need money.

posted by Tay @ 12:30 AM 0 comments

Okay people, MacWorld has come and gone, and I'm not impressed. At least with the new hardware they've announced. What we now have is the iPod Shuffle, and the Mac Mini. These would have to be the two worst products Apple has ever released.

The iPod Shuffle is a flash-based USB key-drive, with a headphone jack. Woopee. Also, it sports the rad feature of complete randomness: there is no display readout of any kind. This is such a rad feature, I'm considering doing it to my own iPod. Pretty good stuff!

And what about the Mac Mini? Sure, it's super tiny, and it's a decent computer. But it's less powerful than the iMac G5's, and is also lacking a display. What's ridiculous is this: if you want to get an Apple Cinema display to go with your new cube, the cost would be so much that it's more sensible to get the iMac G5 with built-in display. Apple really doesn't think much of their target demographic lately, I must say.

On the other hand, iLife '05 looks to kick severe ass, and I want it badly. It's a good thing that Apple made a slower computer to run their more advanced software, with a smaller hard drive, to accomodate the smaller MP3 libraries that suckers will now have to keep for their retarded MP3 players.

I don't get marketing.

posted by Tay @ 3:35 PM 0 comments

Woah
Phil gave me a book about quantum physics, and I've been reading it at his request. The Fabric of the Cosmos by Brian Greene has so far been very interesting, and a real mental excersice. I'm only on chapter 4, and I have finally come to understand Young Einstien, the movie. It was all great back in the day to laugh at a guy with crazy hair who plays electric guitar and blows himself up by splitting an atom with a chisel, but the talk of light's properties of constant speed always weirded me out. Now I get it. Thanks Phil.

posted by Tay @ 4:46 PM 0 comments

The Evil Trifecta, AKA My Bad Day
Bad things happen to me in threes. They don't happen often, but when they do they bring a couple friends along. They usually follow a theme too: one will give me a headache, one will drain my savings account, and the third is a wild-card. Last time, I ran into an ex-girlfriend, got my car towed, and was super-late for work; all while carrying the burning pain of a fresh tattoo.

Today I got a papercut. I hate papercuts more than anything. More than knife cuts, sword cuts, blunt-force trauma whatever. So to follow that little mishap, I decided to crash my car. Not too badly I don't think, but repairs could cost anywhere from $400-$1400 dollars. Automotive repair is funny like that. The only major problem is that I now have to enter my car from the passenger side. Lovely.

And the third thing? Well, let's just say that my New Year's Resolution didn't last very long.

I'm sleeping in today.

posted by Tay @ 6:29 AM 0 comments

Here's the same old song and dance. If you wouldn't mind giving it a score of "5 and buy", that'd be great. Though it would seem that a lot of people are giving it that score. Or, at least a lot of the people who are commenting on it are giving it that score. I'm excited. There's a $2005.00 prize for the best submission in January, and I wouldn't mind that at all. I better come up with some new designs.

You'll notice the little vector graphic of myself in the picture too. That took a few solid hours of work, I don't mind saying. It turned out super-keen though, if you ask me.

My goal for January: create a t-shirt that gets a score of 4+. Or get a real job, whatever comes first.

posted by Tay @ 6:11 PM 0 comments

2005
The new year always seems to annoy me. The news-pappers go into ridiculously in-depth reviews of stuff that was already oversensationalized when it actually happened.

"Remember Janet Jackson, and how she completely changed our lives? And by that we mean we just shoved it down your throats until it was all you could talk about. Remember that?"

I don't want to review last year. I know what happened, and I don't need to dwell on it. I'd rather focus my energy on making 2005 kick ass. It's like I was saying to Colm earlier tonight. Take my love-life for example. An absolute disaster zone. No positive stories can be made from 2004 in this respect. Funny stories perhaps, but nothing I can feel particularily proud of.

But that was 2004. It's January 1st, 2005 now, and things are already looking better. Even if my date today turns out badly, I know that things will be better. I'm older, wiser, and know that there's nothing shitty in my life that I don't have the direct power to change myself. If I think that something in my life is shitty, I will drop it like a hot rock. There are only 365 days this year, and I don't plan on spending a single one feeling sad about how the last 365 days could have been better.

I know that they're hokey, but I have a New Years Resolution. To paraphrase Deathcab For Cutie: I won't sit and wonder about every love that could've been, if I'd only thought of something charming to say.

Happy New Year.

posted by Tay @ 3:20 AM 0 comments